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A Beginner's handbook to overthinking and worrying.

Jwalant Bhatt
June 12th, 2021 · 4 min read

So you have a problem in your life. It could be any problem. Maybe it’s a bill you’re stressing over, maybe it’s a problem related to your job. A lover’s spat perhaps? It could be any problem. Certainly the best thing to do would be to fixate on that problem and keep thinking about it, right? The most obvious course of action would be to of course, lose sleep over your problem and paralyse yourself, because that’s what makes problems go away.

Look at all these people. Going about their lives like it’s a normal day. What would they know about the humongous problem you’re facing right now. None of these people have ever had financial trouble. They’ve never faced embarrassment at their jobs before. What would they know about grieving a loved one. They’ve never panicked about their career, been sued, been in love with someone who didn’t love them back, or gone through anything most humans go through in a lifetime. This problem you’re facing is yours, and yours alone. You are the first person in the world experiencing this problem, and only you will ever know what a burden it is.

No one has had to face the horrors of war, so they wouldn’t know what a problem feels like. No lady has had to send her husband, sons and brothers to the battlefield, fully aware that this could be the very last time she sees them. No one has stared down the barrel of a gun before, and known these would probably be their last moments on Earth. No one has ever been trapped in a submarine, thousands of feet below surface, running out of oxygen, waiting desperately for a rescue boat that would be too late. Somehow, whatever it is that you’ve only recently started worrying about, completely justifies you losing your hair over it, and being a total dick to yourself. Well, I’m sure you know best. Humans don’t age anyway, so you have all the time you need to fixate on your problem, and it’ll magically go away.

And if, the bad thing does happen, that you don’t get the job, or you find yourself in a messy situation, know that we’ll all be here. We’ve all been here since the beginning, all seven billion of us. We’ve been waiting eagerly for you to fuck up, and laugh at you. We’re all going to rejoice as you hit a temporary setback, because that’s what we’re here for. None of us have a life of our own. What would we know about having problems of our own? None of us are entangled in our own complex problems, none of us have had relationship, professional or personal problems. We simply do not face the kind of problems you face on a daily basis. We just sit around all day waiting for you to trip, and then high five each other. All seven billion of us are going to turn up at your house and write lol on your door as soon as you fuck up. That’s what’s going to happen.

Also while we’re at it, don’t you dare take a creative risk. You think greats like Michelangelo, Da Vinci, Bach, Tarantino, and Rowling ever spent time doubting themselves? Or worrying about the outcome of their task? Hell no. All they did was be perfect. Flawless execution and original ideas come from sitting around safely, not rocking your boat, and hoping something brilliant will fall into your lap. So don’t you dare take a risk and expose yourself. Even after you’re dead, hundreds of years later, we’ll maintain the shrine we built for you, to highlight your failures. We’ll engrave the words, ‘This person made a mistake’ on your tombstone so that the whole world knows what a fool you were, for trying to do something original and manifesting your vision into this world. Of course the Universe cares about you, and the fact that you made a mistake. You think it’s busy regulating the billions of stars and the trillions of planets around us? Nope.

It’s the same with doing what you love. Never go off the beaten path, who knows what kind of frightening treasures you may encounter when venturing into the land of the unknown. Never take a risk. No one else has in their life. You’ll certainly be the first one to do it. Just keep holding yourself back and sabotaging your attempts, that’s the safe path.

Honestly, the best thing to do would be to not do anything at all. Keep on fixating on the one small speck of a problem that’ll plague your life, forever. Sit in limbo and keep overthinking, instead of actually doing something about the problem. Instead of, say, trying to be the best possible version of yourself and being kind to people. Instead of taking bold and frightening risks, in spite of the fact that they frighten you. Instead of, say, leaving a legacy behind, so that one day, your great grandchildren could tell their mates about their great grandparent, and what a badass they were, and how they achieved something brilliant in the 21st century. Don’t rock the boat. Can’t risk embarrassing yourself, can you? Best to keep your head down and mindlessly drudge through life.

But none of this matters, really. Because you’re worried about that problem, aren’t you? Maybe it’s a bill you’re stressing over, maybe it’s a problem related to your job. A lover’s spat perhaps? It could be any problem. Certainly the best thing to do would be to fixate on that problem and keep thinking about it, right? None of us have ever been in a bad situation before. And I’m sure, whatever it is, it’s not going away anytime soon, and this will be your last chance to right the wrong. The rest of your life will certainly be absolute shit, all because of this one problem. Just like the other problems you used to worry about two years ago, and now, can’t even remember.

Seize the day, my friend. Seize the goddamn day.

What inspired this post, partially:

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